In response to Horne and Hicks's critique of my 1994 revision of Bowen Theory, I present an updated rationale for my work. I argue that the primary difference in my construction of emotional differentiation rests in the way "self" is constructed. I suggest that many women, persons from less individualistic cultures, and very spiritual persons develop a "connected self" that is significantly different than Bowen's image of separate selves engaged with each other. I hold that Bowen Theory privileges individuality and ignores many of the positive aspects of togetherness. I put forth an inclusive model for differentiation that equally prioritizes each.